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Man on the run |
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He's been chased around the world, manacled to chairs by secret services, beaten up and imprisoned — and still looks rather fine! We caught up with Richard Tomlinson, ex-MI6 officer and author of The Big Breach, the book which landed him in prison for breaking the Official Secrets Act, and got to know him a little better… |
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by
Norah Manners
uploaded: 29-03-2004
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bint: Where are you now?
Can you tell me or will you have to kill me afterwards?
Richard Tomlinson: I live near Cannes, in France.
Describe an average day in the life of Richard Tomlinson.
There is no such thing as an average day. I spend a lot of days sailing on my boat. And writing a book. When I am at home I do lots of sport (mostly cycling) and gardening.
Do you have a girlfriend at the moment?
Sort of. My last girlfriend was German. We finished because of the distance and because she did not speak French. My new girlfriend is German, and also does not speak French, so I doubt it will last long!
How much hassle do MI6 cause you on a day to day basis — are you under surveillance, phones tapped, harrassed? How does this affect your relationships with friends, family, lovers?
I don't think they put me under surveillance now. I would think they have better things to do. But my life has never been the same since they started putting me under surveillance — it really turned me against them.
You were arrested once for trying to see your parents in France — have you managed to see them since?
Yes. They don't get hassled any more. They can visit me here in France.
How often do you get to see your parents then?
They visit once or twice a year. I can't go back to the UK. My elder brother lives in the UK and has a large family so he cannot visit me because of cost.
Do you suffer a lot of stress because of your situation?
No not really. I get a bit angry with them [MI6] sometimes, but not stress really.
How would a girl's life change if she became your girlfriend — would MI6 give her a hard time too?
They would not give her a hard time, no. I don't think they would pay much attention nowadays.
Do you find girls fancy you more because you were a spy?
Sometimes — but I don't find this very appealing. I prefer people who value who I am now, not what I was.
MI6 spent a lot of money training you, sending you trotting around Portsmouth asking people strange questions and getting you arrested abroad. How did you change as a person after joining MI6? Did it make you more confident with women?
Yes — indeed it made me fairly arrogant I would say.
Did you find the training you did had a negative effect on other aspects of your personality?
I don't think the training we did is very good for one's personal development. I found that it made me seek to justify lying and made me over-confident and brazen. It was mild brainwashing really.
Tell us about spies — is it worth us ladies hanging around Vauxhall station trying to pull one? Are they handsome, dashing Bond-a-likes or little, clever, grey men — spill!
They are not much different from the people who work for any employer who demands high-calibre recruits. Most are Oxbridge, speak a few languages, have a good range of extra-curricular activities (sport, cultural primarily) are fairly socially adept. Don't forget that quite a few are women too!
Do you feel like you will always be looking over your shoulder, or do you think one day you will be allowed to return to England, to settle down and have kids — have a ‘normal’ life?
I don't want a ‘normal life’! I wouldn't return to England (except for family visits) even if I were allowed. I like living abroad. I suspect I will end up sailing around the world, and probably die falling off the back of my boat having a wee!
Who are your friends now?
I don't have a wild social life — nor do I particularly want one. My best friend is my cat! I prefer the company of a few good friends than superficial socialising with people I don't have much in common with.
Oh! May we see a picture of your cat?
As Fatso is totally black, he is very hard to photograph, and in the photos I have taken in the past he just looks like a big slug.
How do you feel about Britain now ? As a spy you must have had to show a fairly hefty degree of patriotism. How has that changed now?
Yes it has changed. I don't feel patriotic to the Union Jack any more. Indeed, I flagged my boat under the French rather than British flag. In sports I tend to prefer New Zealand (where I was born) — unfortunately they did not get the chance to beat England in the Rugby World Cup. I still support England in football though.
Do you have to have a double-barrelled name to be totally accepted by an organisation like MI6 — is it a real establishment place (Eton/Oxford/Guards)?
No, there is none of that nonsense in MI6. I'm not upper class by any means, but never felt even remotely uncomfortable in MI6 or in the FCO.
What advice would you give to a graduate approached by MI6?
I would say go for it — it is a great career. But I would ask lots of questions about personnel management and employment rights. In particular, I would ask whether all the failings which I explain in my book have been addressed and rectified. Also, bear in mind that if you fall out with them (as I did), they are extremely nasty and vindictive. If you do fall out with them, get a lawyer quickly, and write to me for advice!
What do you know now that you wish you had known 10 years ago?
I wish I had planned more carefully my career at that age. It is much more difficult to break into a new career aged 40 (which I now am).
Have you ever bought a lady a box of milk tray?
No — I am embarrassed by allusions to Bond. Moreover, I rarely even buy flowers for girlfriends! I'm sorry if that is disappointing to some, but I think relationships should be built on stronger foundations than gifts.
Now, I know you aren’t too keen on the idea of an ‘average’ day or a ‘normal’ life, but could you please take a deep breath and describe your perfect woman!
Perfect woman? No such thing! Not getting seasick and liking cats would be a good start though.
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Able seaman
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"I'll probably die falling off the back of my boat having a wee!"
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In at the deep end
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Check out the curtains
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